Had I been a “silk” lily

In an ornate shining pot

Or a queen of butterflies

With wings from shimmering shells

It would not have really mattered

If you remembered me

Or totally forgot

It would not have really mattered

Where I started to change your world

And where I ended

what season I came

Took form and shape .. Became !

Colored my wings

Extended

Soared to ecstasy

It would not have mattered

Details of my name

My face .. the color of my eyes

The sprouting yearning in my heart

Upon a random meeting

Or a fancy game

But I am not a Lily of silk

Lifeless

And Lacking feeling

I still don’t know

What sins I have committed?

And who will punish me

-When I decline my dreams-

Who tightens my shackles?

What have I really gained?

Here I am

My Fragments scattered

As mirrors of my existence shattered

Falling a sliver at a time

Between me

And illusions of our yester dreams

I watch my splinters

crushed by longing

My masks unraveled

My face reflecting childlike pureness

No fake proclaim

Here I am

Seethed in sorrow as I confess

You are still infesting my memory

 Huge as my whole being

Hankering .. alienation .. misery

I try to prop me together again

Twitch my wings

Distance myself from you ..

I want to fly

Exit from memory ache

From surreal sub consciousness

Shatter the myth of time

Frozen at the turning point

Forget

Forget You.

Erase you from my loneliness

My languishing for you

But the memory of time

Refuses adamantly to stop!

Declares its disobedience

Tightens more my chains

Details float back

All details

Burning their etchings in my heart

Echoes of songs and laughter

Details of your features

Haunt me

Cleansed by tears

Flickering Shadows of candles

As our lashes Trembled

Quietness  and dark

I come back to you

I come back

Drenched in tears

The wings are crushed!!

Why do Faces come and never leave ?

Today I am filled with an agonizing wish

A horrific desire

To die in your arms

Maybe this time I will Move time

For the last time

So I would not be

Eternalized

In the memory of time

A lily of silk

An illusion butterfly

Tattered dreams

..

Wings that cannot fly.

Thuraya Alarayed ( al Urayyid)